Power, and Abuse of Power

Power is on my mind.  Again.  As always.  I have spent the last year learning of the careful dynamic of power between adults who give each other power safely, with sanity, and willingly.  The rules are so careful.  The rewards are so stimulating (and I mean emotionally, nevermind sex for a while... sex sex sex everywhere I look, the feeding famishes the craving!)  The rewards are so stimulating: as I remember speaking candidly, openly, honestly, being my true self, revealing my fears and revealing my pride, revealing the bits that need guiding and finding solace in humility, from time to time.  Finding solace behind the strong barriers and boundaries that I am capable of erecting and maintaining.  Finding solace among the like-minded.  Finding solace.  Power is on my mind, and I wish there were a way to elevate the level of discourse around the globe to address this idea of power.

Abuse of power ubiquitously fuels the day's news:  the rich cannibalize the poor in any modern society, including third world nations.  The female is in conflict with the male in India.  The law is in conflict with the prisoners in Sri Lanka.  The black is in conflict with the white in the USA.  The English are in conflict with the French in Canada.  The people are in conflict with the ruler of Spain.  The spiritual are in conflict with the corrupt in Tibet.  Aboriginal culture is in conflict with Modern Japan.  Palestinians forever in conflict with Israelis.  Artisans in conflict with The Machine in every nation: truth wants expression, and the silencing hand wants silence.  The power, thus, struggles.

People will say what they will about the Fifty Shades literary phenomenon: I defended it when it first arrived, and I'll defend it again, because the way the trilogy handles power is perfect.  Submission does not (in these books, or in my experience) equal "powerless."  Submission does not (in these books, or in my experience) equal "brainless."  Submission does not (in these books, or in my experience) equal "defenceless."  The trilogy illustrates this over, and over, and over, and over again.  Our beautiful heroine is young and strong: she was never introduced to the world of BDSM before the story begins (and hey, everybody needs introducing at some point!  We are not born experts...) and so her noobish questions and mistakes are familiar to anybody being honest with herself. Our beautiful heroine can hold her own against a physical assailant.  Our beautiful heroine can drive really well.  Our beautiful heroine is not afraid of food, adventure, or chasing a good story.  And, our beautiful heroine is not afraid to stand up to someone she loves and to whom she will submit in the bedroom -- if nowhere else.  Our beautiful heroine has a solid idea by the end of the trilogy exactly what kind of submission appeals to her (even if it is not everybody's idea of submission).  Without apology, she enjoys her version of bedroom submission.  Without apology, she takes back her power when someone threatens to abuse it, or whenever she requires it.  All of it.  

Abuse of power is everywhere in the world.  "Exchange" of power -- the BDSM power exchange --  means the Dom controls certain things and the sub controls certain things, and the division is neat and tidy -- a division I can understand and a rule that is clearly posted for any to see.  Signposts.  No surprises.  (Well, ideally, anyway.  Beware the whimsical dominant who never really learned about power.)  There is logic and care in a Dom/sub relationship that the vanilla world could learn from.  A collar may not protect me from all the potential abuses of power in the world, but it reminds me of exactly how powerful I am, and that reminds me of how strong I am, and that reminds me of my inner peace.