The Balloon Chair of Hope

The Hammock of Aftercare has a close relative: the Balloon Chair of Hope!  Some of the balloon chairs, you should know, are actually Balloon Chairs of Faith... It's good to distinguish between one's hopes and one's faith.  I raise this because, yesterday, I had to miss out on a discussion about aftercare, though the facilitator was good enough to show me a link to consult in my own time.  The link refers back to Mistress 160's Abode which I had not yet consulted, and therein a chapter on "emergency" aftercare.  The title alone gives me new insight into the importance of aftercare which I had never before taken into consideration.  Aftercare is not merely nice, courteous, and proper:  it is an urgency.  And the risk of "sub-drop" (or even Dom-drop or Domme-drop) increases when other urgencies combine, such as being physically alone after play, whether because play was online or over the phone, or whether because the O/other has somehow and inexplicably vanished (a common occurrence in the online Lifestyle communities).

Sometimes I wish it was a Master who taught me all of this good information.  It is, after all, part of what I envision in a relationship with one to whom I submit.  I envision asking questions; learning; absorbing; hearing His voice explain to me the chaos of the world and how to make sense of it.  Why my body reacts as it does after His touch, rough or soft.  But that is a daydream, and I do digress.

I know that I have felt sub-drop in the past.  Not commonly, but it has happened.  I thought it was simply me, "over-reacting."  I thought it was simply my own personality failing me.  I did not realize there were physical symptoms and reactions that one needs to take into consideration after intense play, and these reactions are common among many personalities who are feeling the absence of aftercare.  To me it felt as though I had been hypnotized and then left on the edge of a cliff, only to wake up utterly alone and full of vertigo.  I felt abandoned.  It ruined the day entirely, a great sadness permeating all things.  It is a common feeling, apparently, and Mistress 160's Abode gives good advice on how to fix oneself under those circumstances.  Faith in oneself.  Hope for the future.  Taking care of oneself; being strong for oneself; and knowing oneself well enough to know what one needs to recover and feel joy again.

Sitting upon the Balloon Chair of Faith, knowing that, despite every unlikelihood and physical impossibility, the chair will support and lift you.  Your closed eyes will open.  Your blanched cheeks will flush again.  Your dry lips will moisten once more.

Aftercare is not just for submissives.  We may all exhaust, sometime.  And we all require that lift from someone else, sometimes, when our own lift needs help.  I'm quite sure this is not the last I've to say on the topic; it is gaining popularity (thank heavens) and maybe gaining some ritual as well with the online practitioners.